Happy late new year to you all.

It has definitely been a long time since my last post and it’s also a little too late to say happy new year but better late than never, right? I have still been going on and checking my blog now and again but I’ve never had the time to write anything anymore. Looking back at my previous posts, they do seem like a little cringey I’d have to say.

Since 2020 is a new year, let me give you a ‘brief’ update of what happened back in 2019 and some changes that will be going on for this year. 2019 was a particularly sad year for me. I was living in Tokyo until March and everything was great, I met new people, friends and acquaintances but when I came back to the UK that’s when everything went a little downhill.

The top 3 things that saddened me in 2019:

·         Broke up with my boyfriend after a long-distance relationship

·         I got ghosted by a guy I dated for 4+ months

·         Got a sales job that gave me stress

Let me try to give you a clearer picture with each of those bullet points. So, the 1st bullet point…back in 2018 was the time I moved to Tokyo to teach English and I left my newly attained boyfriend in the UK. It was absolutely difficult because he would spare me no time to talk and I always had to pester him. There were a lot of issues going on with the relationship too but I gritted my teeth until we finally saw each other near the end of my teaching year. We got back to the UK together after a horrendous holiday and he decided to break up with me after arriving back. If I had not gotten into a relationship, I think I would have stayed there for a couple of years at least. It was pretty devastating to say the least. And the worse thing was that I thought I still had a chance.  After 1 solid week of analyzing and thinking things through I thought ‘**** him’ why do I need to be sad when he did me wrong in the first place.

Not long after I decided I should move on, I moved on pretty quickly. It gets easier especially if you’re angry at someone and so this is where the second bullet point comes in. I met a guy and yes, I have posted about him before. Our relationship was always ambiguous, I wanted a clear status and he never gave me one. Long story short, I fell hard and when he decided to ghost me for 2 months+ I was all torn up.  It had only been this year that he had decided to contact me again asking me how I was and of course, I replied as courteously as I could. *cough* At that time, I felt nothing and there’s no use for me to keep in contact anymore. Once lost, always.

In the middle of Summer, I mentioned already that I landed myself a sales job and it was hell. Gave me anxiety, stress and whatever more. Tried to lookup tips and tricks on how I can sell myself better but my personality does not match that at all. Tried taking a consultative approach but probably with my calm demeanor, they didn’t feel threatened by me haha. I’ve seen some pretty hardcore sellers out there and that was something I could never do unless I disregard my morals. I decided to quit on my last day of probation and I went elsewhere the following week.  I don’t think I would ever do a sales job like that ever again; can you imagine having nightmares about being on the phone day in and day out?

Anyway, that was my year in 2019 and things didn’t turn out as I had planned. So, what now? They say new year, new me and all that bull. Been trying to turn myself around myself.

I joined a gym for 6 months and the first 2 months I was hitting it hard, went there at least 5 to 6 days a week trying to slim down my fat thighs. Cardio was the main thing I did the most, don’t know how to use weights effectively in my workout. I’ve been lazing around now and haven’t been as much, only going there 3 times a week now. My diet, no comment. I got a job working in marketing and I still have a long way to go, it’s pretty fun and challenging. I’m always up for a challenge. There’s one particular person whom that I find interesting, I’ve started talking to this guy over a month ago and he’s pretty fascinating…

In both positive and negative ways.

I HAVE NEVER SEEN A GUY WHO’S SO GODDAMN CONFIDENT. Sometimes he comes across as arrogant and cocky, it’s so off-putting. The thing that I’ve not seen from anyone else is his drive and ambition, not only that but he has the ability to act on it too. The ability to act on something, it’s empowering especially if they have certain goals they want to achieve. It’s something I don’t have since I’m lazy but I’m working on it. He’s a strange one but I’ll tolerate it. I know I’ll learn something from this guy. I’m going to class him as my mentor.

My mentor isn’t that much older than me although he does have a few grey hairs. I guess that’s what it is like being in a medical profession.  

https://www.medicalbag.com/home/specialties/nurse-practitioners/condescending-doctors-and-how-to-deal-with-them/ 
This site says it all and no I don’t wanna judge.